Therapy for Men NYC | Male Therapists

You Carry a Lot

Many men grew up with a clear script: work, provide, show up, handle it. "I should be able to handle this." "Toughen up." "Men don't cry." Over time, that conditioning can make it hard to step back, even for a moment, because you have been the one responsible for so long.

That is starting to shift, but most men were never really encouraged to check in with themselves, let alone talk to a therapist about it. They are expected to have it all together.

How are you, actually?

If you stopped for a minute, you might notice you feel:

Irritable, with less patience than you used to have
Disconnected from the people around you
Anxious, or braced for the next thing
Exhausted in a way sleep does not fix
Unsure what you actually need

That is often the point where therapy can help.

How It Can Show Up in Men's Lives

It does not always look like "stress." Sometimes it looks like this:

A man sitting in his parked car on a Brooklyn brownstone street at dusk, hands on the wheel, taking a few minutes before going inside

Losing patience faster with your partner or kids

Feeling numb, disconnected, or checked out

A drink, or something else, to decompress most nights

Keeping everything to yourself

Working more, because slowing down feels uncomfortable

Running through everything that could go wrong

Sitting in the car a few extra minutes before going inside

Feeling like no one really knows what's going on underneath

Many men keep it to themselves because talking about it won't fix it. Often, though, putting words to it is exactly where things start to shift.

What Men Come to Therapy For

Counseling for men is not one-size-fits-all, and the reasons are as varied as the men who come in. Some of the most common:

Work Pressure & Burnout

The job that takes everything, and the guilt when it doesn't. More on therapy for burnout.

Anxiety & Overthinking

The mind that won't switch off at night. More on anxiety therapy.

Depression

Feeling flat, stuck, or checked out for longer than a bad week.

Communication & Relationships

The same argument, again. Relationship counseling for men often starts here. More on relationship therapy.

Anger & Irritability

A shorter fuse than you want to have, and what sits underneath it.

Substance Use

Drinking or using more to get through the day, or to switch off at night.

Major Life Changes

Divorce, a career change, losing a parent, retirement, or a change in your health.

Loneliness & Isolation

Having no one to really talk to, and quietly believing that is your own fault. It is more common than it looks, and it is not a moral failing.

Identity & the Bigger Questions

Feeling directionless, unsure who you are outside of work or a role, or sitting with questions that don't have quick answers.

Becoming a Father

Trying to be a different father than the one you had, and the questions that brings up about identity, responsibility, and your own childhood. Therapy for new dads can make room for all of it.

A lot of men come in because a relationship is struggling, work feels relentless, or they feel stuck and disconnected from themselves. Underneath, there is often a deeper sense of not feeling truly seen or understood, by a partner, a parent, or even by themselves.

Strength and Support Can Coexist

Going to therapy does not mean you are weak. It does not mean you can't handle things. For many men, it is the first place they get to be honest without having to perform strength.

Being capable, dependable, protective, ambitious, or self-reliant isn't the problem. Those qualities may have helped you build a life you're proud of.

The problem is somewhere else

The problem is when being strong starts to mean having nowhere to go with fear, grief, uncertainty, anger, or exhaustion.

Some men become very good at solving problems while having little space to experience what can't immediately be solved.

Anger Is Worth Understanding, and You're Still Responsible for What You Do With It

Anger isn't automatically a problem. It can signal frustration, hurt, fear, helplessness, resentment, crossed boundaries, or needs that haven't been expressed.

For many men, anger is the tip of the iceberg. It is sometimes described as a secondary emotion: often the most accessible one, the one men are taught it is okay to feel, while something more vulnerable sits underneath and is harder to get in touch with.

A man standing at his kitchen counter at sunset, hands resting on the edge and head lowered, taking a slow breath

Above the surface

Irritability, a short fuse, shutting down, walking away

Underneath

Hurt, fear, helplessness, grief, exhaustion, needs that haven't been said

Understanding what's underneath anger doesn't excuse yelling, intimidation, aggression, or behavior that hurts other people. It gives you more choices about what happens next.

Therapy can help you notice escalation earlier, understand your triggers, communicate more directly, and respond in ways that are more consistent with the man, partner, or father you want to be.

"I Don't Want to Sit Around and Talk About My Feelings"

Fair enough. Good therapy does not have to mean talking in circles for hours. Sometimes it is emotional, and sometimes it is very practical. You might look at:

A conflict that keeps happening in your marriage
What happens right before your temper goes
The dread that starts on Sunday afternoon, the Sunday scaries
Why work keeps winning over the rest of your life, even when you don't want it to

Often it isn't that there is nothing to say. Many people just haven't had the language for it yet, and finding it is part of the work. And if you are more comfortable thinking things through than talking about feelings, that works too. Thinking and feeling are rarely as separate as they seem.

You don't have to arrive with any of it figured out. That is part of what therapy is for.

"A lot of the men I work with feel exactly the same way at first. You don't need to have the right words yet. We'll just talk, and I'll help you find them as we go."
David Watson, LMSW, psychotherapist

"Therapy is a process, and we don't always know what we are going to find when we start out. I don't expect magic to happen immediately."
Declan Taintor, LMSW, psychotherapist

What Happens in a Session

Therapy with us is collaborative and practical. Broadly, it moves through four things, at your pace:

1

Figuring out what's going on

Often we start with how your week went, and listen, without an agenda, to what is weighing on you most.

2

Understanding your patterns

Where the reactions come from, and what keeps them going.

3

Building more options

Ways to regulate yourself, communicate what you need, and tolerate the emotions that are hard to sit with.

4

Taking it outside the session

Turning insight into action between sessions, with practical tools you actually use.

You don't need an agenda. Some of the most useful sessions start with "I'm not sure what to talk about today." Sessions are virtual across New York State, so you can talk from your home office, your car, or wherever you have some privacy.

Therapists for Men in NYC

We are a group psychotherapy practice, so you are matched with a men's therapist who actually does this work, rather than whoever is free. Some men feel more comfortable with a male therapist. Others find it helpful to work with a woman and hear a different perspective. Either way, we will help you find the right fit.

Meet Our Therapists Find Your Match in 4 Questions

The Rachel Parodneck & Associates Psychotherapy team

Male Therapists

David Watson, LMSW

Warm, conversational, and practical. David works with men on relationships, anger, fatherhood, identity, work stress, and life transitions, and helps turn insight into real next steps. Morning and weekend availability.

Meet David

Declan Taintor, LMSW

Down to earth, very direct, and light on therapy jargon. Declan works with men on relationships, fatherhood, identity, divorce, and the bigger existential questions. Weekday availability.

Meet Declan

Women Therapists Who Also Work with Men

Maya Gauri, LMSW

Works with men on anxiety, depression, and the childhood patterns that still shape how they react today.

Meet Maya

Jenna Martinez, LMSW

Works with men through grief, loss, and addiction, and offers LGBTQIA+ affirming therapy.

Meet Jenna

Jennifer Ritchie, LMSW

Works with men in demanding careers and caregiving roles, including healthcare professionals, on burnout and stress.

Meet Jennifer

In-Network with Aetna & Northwell Direct

Sessions are virtual across New York State, and we are in-network with Aetna and Northwell Direct. For other plans, we provide monthly superbills for out-of-network reimbursement, and we keep a limited number of sliding-scale spots.

Aetna Northwell Direct

How to Start

1

Book a free consult

Fifteen minutes, no forms, no commitment, and no need to explain everything.

2

Get matched

Tell us what is going on and when you are free, and we will match you to the right psychotherapist and rate.

3

Start at your pace

Virtual sessions anywhere in New York State, around work and the rest of your life.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is therapy for men different from regular therapy?

It is the same kind of psychotherapy, shaped around what men often bring in: pressure to provide, difficulty slowing down, anger that covers something else, and a real hesitation about therapy itself. We meet you where you are, including if you would rather keep it practical.

Should I see a male therapist or a female therapist?

Whichever feels more comfortable. If you would like a male therapist, David Watson and Declan Taintor both work with men, and we can match you with either of them. Some men prefer working with a woman and hearing a different perspective, and several of our women psychotherapists work with men too.

Does going to therapy mean I can't handle things?

No. Many of the men we work with are handling a lot, often too much, on their own. Therapy is a place where you don't have to perform strength to be taken seriously.

I'm not good at talking about feelings. Is that a problem?

Not at all. A lot of men feel that way at first. You don't need the right words yet, and sessions can be as practical as you need them to be.

Do you offer anger management?

We don't run anger management programs. We help men understand what sits underneath anger, notice escalation earlier, and respond in ways that fit who they want to be. If anger or substance use has started to put you or someone else at risk, we will help you find the right level of support.

Is virtual therapy effective for men?

For many men, yes. It removes the commute and the waiting room, and it is often easier to start talking from somewhere familiar. Sessions are virtual across New York State, and we are in-network with Aetna and Northwell Direct.

You Don't Have to Have It Figured Out First

Book a free 15-minute consult, or take the 4-question match and we'll suggest a therapist for you.

Book a Free 15-Minute Consult Find Your Match in 4 Questions

Therapy for Men in NYC