Slacking on Slacks: What a Lack of Grooming & Hygiene Can Really Mean
With so many people working from home, there is no longer a real need to dress up. Have a work meeting? Nothing professional needed below the waist. Dressy tops are the extent of what one is able to broadcast to the world on a video call. But did you know that one’s level of grooming and hygiene can be representative of something else? Something far bigger?
That’s right, if you see someone who is starting to slack on their self-care with regards to grooming and hygiene, that could represent a larger issue with their mental health.
This truth can be overlooked. So let’s talk about depression and hygiene, and about the other things a lack of grooming can mean.
What Does Bad Hygiene Mean? Sometimes, Not Much
As people are working from home, grooming and hygiene have fallen by the wayside for many. When people are not required to dress to impress and pajama bottoms are the new everyday look, it makes sense that people may begin to slack on the self-care aspect of grooming and hygiene. Even the most fastidious among us may take a day or two in between showering or end up washing their hair a bit less frequently.
While there is nothing inherently wrong with being slightly less presentable overall (we are all just trying to stay healthy!), it is very important to continue to practice self-care in terms of cleanliness and grooming for our mental health as well as physical health.
So what does bad hygiene mean? On its own, a skipped shower or a third day in the same sweatpants often means very little. What is worth noticing is a change: when the lack of grooming is new for you, when it lasts for weeks, or when the basics start to feel like too much effort rather than too much bother.
The Basics: A Personal Hygiene Checklist
Cleanipedia created a personal hygiene checklist:
Shower or bathe regularly. Take particular care to do so if you’re dirty or sweaty.
Brush your teeth. This not only protects against oral diseases, but fights bad breath.
Wash your clothes. Ensure there is no leftover sweat or dirt on them.
Wash your bed linen regularly. Bedding comes into regular contact with body fluids such as sweat while you sleep, so change and wash it every week in summer or every two weeks the rest of the year.
Trim your nails. Bitten nails don’t look great, but neither do dirty, long nails.
Wash your hands with soap. Particularly if you have been in contact with raw meat or anyone who is ill.
Cover your mouth with a tissue when coughing or sneezing. This will prevent the spread of germs to others and the contaminated tissue can be thrown away. If you use your hands, be sure to wash them after.
If that list reads as obvious on a good week and impossible on a bad one, keep reading.
Depression and Hygiene: When It Is More Than Slacking
Neglecting one’s personal hygiene is not only bad for your physical health, but it can also be a sign of mental health issues such as depression. If you notice that a friend or partner is not taking care of themselves in terms of hygiene, check in on them.
Depression can drain the energy, motivation, and sense of reward that everyday routines run on. For some people, a shower stops being one task and becomes a dozen: getting up, undressing, standing, washing, drying off, finding clean clothes. Brushing your teeth, washing your hair, or doing laundry can feel just as heavy. Some people call this depression hygiene, and the name fits. It is not about laziness or not caring. It can be what running on empty looks like from the outside.
It can also feed itself. Poor personal hygiene can bring shame, shame can make it harder to see people, and time alone can make a low mood heavier. That loop is one reason the link between hygiene and mental health deserves more attention than it gets.
A few unwashed days are not a diagnosis. But if the change comes along with a low mood, lost interest in things you usually enjoy, or shifts in sleep or appetite that last more than a couple of weeks, it may be worth talking to a professional.
What Causes Poor Hygiene Besides Depression?
Depression is one explanation, not the only one. A lack of grooming can have several sources, and sometimes more than one at a time:
Burnout. When work or caregiving takes everything you have, the care you give yourself is often the first thing to go. If you are not sure which one you are dealing with, we wrote about burnout vs depression and the stages of burnout.
ADHD and executive dysfunction. Hygiene involves a lot of steps, transitions, and remembering. ADHD hygiene struggles are often less about mood and more about getting started, switching tasks, or losing track of time.
Anxiety. Sensory discomfort, health worries, or a mind that is busy elsewhere can all push routines aside. Our anxiety therapy page says more about how that can look.
Grief. After a loss, ordinary routines can stop feeling like they matter for a while.
Trauma. For some people, bathing, undressing, or being alone with their body is uncomfortable for reasons that have a history.
Only you, ideally with someone trained to help, can sort out which of these applies. An article cannot, and it should not try.
Small Steps for the Days When a Shower Feels Like Too Much
None of this replaces support, but on a hard day, smaller can be kinder:
Shrink the task. Washing your face counts. So does brushing your teeth for thirty seconds, or changing into a clean shirt.
Lower the bar on purpose. A seated shower, a quick rinse, or dry shampoo is still care.
Attach it to something you already do. Teeth while the coffee brews, a shower right after the one meeting you have to show up for.
Drop the scorecard. A missed day is information about how you are doing, not a grade.
When to Reach Out, and How Therapy Can Help
If you are struggling with maintaining your personal hygiene, this can be indicative of other bigger issues.
In psychotherapy, the question is rarely “why can’t you just shower?” It is closer to “what has been taking up all your energy?” Working with a psychotherapist can help you make sense of whether what you are seeing is being driven by depression, burnout, anxiety, ADHD, grief, something from your past, or some combination, and what would make the basics feel doable again. If burnout sounds closest, our burnout therapy page is a good next read.
To tackle these larger problems, therapy can be paramount to getting back on track and maintaining a strong baseline of mental health. Book a complimentary consultation with our team, or take the matching quiz to see which of our therapists may be a good fit. Sessions are virtual across New York State, and we are in-network with Aetna and Northwell Direct.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is poor hygiene a sign of depression?
It can be. A drop in grooming or hygiene is something some people with depression describe, but it is not proof of depression by itself. Burnout, ADHD, grief, anxiety, and plain exhaustion can look similar. A change that lasts more than a couple of weeks is worth paying attention to.
What mental illness causes poor hygiene?
There is no single one. Poor hygiene can show up with depression, anxiety, ADHD, trauma, and other conditions, and it can also happen during burnout or grief without any diagnosis at all. That is why it helps to look at the whole picture with a professional rather than guess from one sign.
Why don’t I want to shower?
There can be many reasons. Low energy, low mood, feeling overwhelmed by the number of steps, sensory discomfort, or simply not seeing the point that day are common ones. If it keeps happening and it bothers you, it may be worth getting curious about what is underneath rather than pushing yourself harder.
Can ADHD affect hygiene?
It can. With ADHD, hygiene routines may be hard to start, easy to forget, or uncomfortable on a sensory level. That is different from not caring, and it may respond better to simpler routines and support than to self-criticism.
A missed shower is not a moral failing. Sometimes it is just a Tuesday in sweatpants, and sometimes it is a sign that you have been carrying too much alone. Either way, you are allowed to ask for help.
References:
(April 8, 2020). Cleanipedia. The ultimate personal hygiene checklist for adults. Retrieved from: https://www.cleanipedia.com/gb/family/the-ultimate-personal-hygiene-checklist-for-adults.html
Orenstein, B. (May 20, 2009). Everyday Health. A Guide to Good Personal Hygiene.
